Lost

* my iTouch (but the wonderful Faculty Senate secretary found it and returned it to me)
* 24 pounds since September
* a sense of guilt about a quick turnaround for student documents

Found

* a new love of fresh fruit and veg
* veggie sausage and burgers
* my ribs

Tonight I teach class–this is the class with Stu-mosquito (Stusquito). She/he will be bugging me about hir assignment (that I have not yet graded) and will not go away. Too bad I cannot swat hir away.

* “IreallyneedanAinyourclass. SoIwillannoyyouabouteverypointIdon’treceive” — Stu1 is like a mosquito.

* Stu2 walks into my class ten minutes before the class ends. I tap Stu on the shoulder and say “Let’s chat.”

* Stu3 sends in (for an online class) two “revised” assignments (I did not request them, nor do I want them). I will not be surprised if he asks me to re-grade these two assignments. Yeah, I don’t do that.

*

Got to celebrate my V-day, B-day. Scott still says I’m 37 (what a sweetie).

Thanks for the b-day wishes.

Am saving b-day $$ for an iPad.

Stu dropped. (whew!)

Still have one Stu MIA. Ah, well. I’ve already emailed Stu about this and have heard nothing.

Now that the collaboration portion of the semester has begun, I can breathe easier. Stay tuned for group-related antics.

Received an email from Stu who has been enrolled in my class since day one, but has “had to work and been unable to attend class.” Stu, apparently, is willing to “do what it takes to catch up” for this class.

I had one word for Stu.

Drop.

Hi.

Caught (heh) the interception on Sunday. Since I really don’t care about football, much less the stupid bowl, I was quite surprised to see two great plays. (I was flipping between the Law & Order SVU Man-athon and SB.)

The “good” call for the 2 point conversion was well called and well played; the interception was beautiful! (The replay was elegant.)

Then again, I got to see both Benson *and* Stabler with their shirts off.

We’re starting week 6. How did *that* happen?? Groups are grouping, grading is cut in half.

Mom gets in tomorrow.

Enjoy your week. I’ll post if I have something to say.

I have a sty(e). Left eye. I have no eyelashes (for the most part) on that eyelid. Warm compresses feel really good. And Dr. Google says that’s what I should do.

We had steak for dinner (Scott cooks a hella good steak) and artichokes. MMMmmmmmmm …

I have grading to do, but got through three and had to quit.

Manor does not equal manner.

Commas are not arbitrary, nor is the use of capital letters.

I hate Courier and Comic Sans.

Stu 1: Thank you for contacting me about adding late to my class. You caught up well. So well, in fact that you got the assignment *and* discussion post completed.

Stu 2: Thank you for contacting me about adding late to my class. You failed to complete the assignment and post to the discussion forum. (My response time between your question and my response was less than ten minutes.)

Stu 3: I understand you have a hurt hand, but you “cannot write” for 4-6 weeks? I teach a writing-intensive class. How will this play out?

Stu 4: What part of “hybrid class” did you not understand when I explained it on Monday *and* Wednesday?

All Stus: I can check when you log into the online portion of the class. I know how long you stay on, what pages you read, what email you read, when you post, what posts you’ve read. I am Big Brother. So, lying to me about when you checked the class discussion forum doesn’t fly. FWIW.

Dear Amb13n:

Thank you for working. Thank you for allowing me to have my first full night of sleep in three days.

Yeah, I’m a little tired this morning, but I’ll take that trade off for interrupted sleep any day.

Two sections (same course) today, then home for lunch and a nap. (No offense to your effectiveness, but this first week of class has been killer.)

Love, snores, and snuggles,

Tomorrow

Ugh … the semester starts. I have five classes.

It actually feels good to be back; I get to dress as a professional (thus my attitude improves).

I lost another pound this week.

I exercised today.

I taught my night class.

I teach my morning classes tomorrow.

Still working on my NY resolution (not saying the “F” word). I’m doing OK with that, but I have not yet have a zero day (or at least I don’t think I have). I’ve told my friends about it, and they think it’s hysterical. They also keep asking me the tally for the day.

So. I’m drinking some wine. I will be in bed very soon.

NYE party.

Good people

I smacked a friend in the mouth – the reason is *trivial* (understandably, he immediately left).

I am in the dog house. Have sent e-apologies. Hubs is pissed. I am embarrassed. I don’t think there is a hole big enough right now. I have done all I can (e-wise) to control damage.

2010 not starting out so well for me. (le sigh)

Folks, I have to go back to work tomorrow. Well, I don’t *really* have to go back to work. Not in the dealing with students way. But, I need to create 5 syllabi and get my online course ready to roll.

I believe that I will also be writing/printing quizzes in advance and creating as many grade forms as I can (time saving measure).

I see many folders, and labels, and sharpies, and swearing (esp. when working with the online course).

I’d really like some supporting vibes (or at least soothing words and a pat on the head).

Did I mention that I’m teaching 5 courses this semester … FIVE …

I’m stupid; I volunteered.

Classes start 1/4. (I *hate* the new calendar.)

Have a great day! *mwah* *mwah*

I am so happy to be here during the holidays.

We just came from pizza and beer at our local (the bartender used to be our next door neighbo and we both miss him).

Tomorrow, we have two Christmas dinners.

I heart being surrounded by friends.

RIP Brittany Murphy

Damn.

Bad heart? Drugs? Murder? Sleeping with Tiger Woods or Jon Gosselin? Aliens? Zombies? (I wonder how many of these theories will crop up in the next few days.)

Yes, Stu. You failed my class (with a 53% no less). I understand you want to meet with me so you can cry and guilt me into “changing my mind.” Right now, I have all the sympathy of a calculator. The numbers are what the numbers are. I cannot accept missed assignments; I will not re-grade assignments; I think we are done here.

But, if you insist, I will meet with you after the break.

(Yes, I copied my chair on my response, which was no where near as snarky as this post.)

It’s four degrees. FOUR.

Remember when Jimmy Carter asked us to turn down the thermostat and put on a sweater? Well, I’m sitting in my home wearing a sweatshirt robe (zipped) over a flannel shirt, fingerless mittens, fleece pants, socks, and slippers. And, I love it!

OK.

Grading looms ….

HAHAHA!! No, not with the grading … but with Tiger Woods and his wondering penis.

I feel sad for his wife and kid (kids?), but damn, I do not care.

Advice from your prof:

1) Do not ask me if I know what your grade is. Of course I don’t. I have not completed the spreadsheets.

2) Do not ask me “what if I make ____ on my exam, will I get an ‘A’”? I do not play the number game. You have the grades, the percentages, and a calculator. Run the numbers all you want.

3) Remember, when you get your final grade, the numbers are what the numbers are. The semester is over. There is no more work to do, especially no rewrites, extra credit, “added points” (some students have the nerve to ask me to “nudge” their grade up a letter). If you earn a 78%, then that’s C+. (BTW, it’s on the syllabus.)

4) If you submitted final assignments on Thursday do not expect them to be graded by Tuesday.

5) The more polite your questions about your grade, the more likely you are to get a response from me.

Updated to add I have edited this f*cker three times now. Tired? Stressed? Overworked? You decide.

Re-scan and mammogram are fine.

*wipes brow*